Mortal Kombat Broadcasted!
by Caibel
Summary: What if, after MK4, Shinnok's Amulet lead Quan Chi somewhere else than Outworld? What if it landed him inside TV? Hilarity ensues.


Disclaimer: I don't own anything in the following story. Anything related to Mortal Kombat is owned by Midway... And... Err... I don't know who owns most of the other things, but yeah. I'm broke.

WARNING: This fic is NOT for people who dislike crossovers. Expect to see a lot of them, although they won't stick around for long unless in reference to a previous joke.

Also, if there's anything about the characters being OOC that upsets you, please let me know how I can fix it.

This is my first fic in a really, really long time, so it won't be of the greatest quality. You have been warned.

NETHERREALM

"GET BACK HERE!" the ninja spectre barked in rage. Quan Chi, the former high priest of fallen god Shinnok and seasoned sorceror, was running for all his worth, beads of sweat flying from his gray hide as he hauled tail out of the cave like a banshee. Scorpion followed, growling in frustration as he pursued the murderer of his clan and family. Quan Chi shoved aside every oni and undead being in his path, and Scorpion did away those in his way with his Mugai Ryu easily. Quan Chi desperately surveyed his surroundings, looking for a resource he could use to slow Scorpion down, and out the corner of his eye he spotted Drahmin and Moloch, the two oni of whom he had arranged his deal. The sorceror brought two curved fingers to his lips and released a high pitched whistle, which caught their attention. They looked over to Quan Chi, then at his pursuer, and as planned flung themselves upon Scorpion in attack. "Get off me! Get the hell outta my way, you bastards!" Scorpion grumbled as he struggled to fight off the two. Quan Chi quickly opened a portal with the aid of Shinnok's amulet and leapt inside as fast as he could.

Moloch was the first to witness Quan Chi's flight, and stumbled towards the portal. Scorpion quickly kicked Drahmin off of him and ran into it first, followed by the two oni to their escape as promised by the sorceror. After passing through a blinding flash of light and experiencing the strange sensation of his organs searing hot yet his skin intensely cold, Scorpion reemerged in a strange, chunkily drawn canyon with Quan Chi. Quan Chi cried out in fear as he turned around and started running, Scorpion following. _What the hell?_ Scorpion thought as he looked around at the cheesy environment. _Is this one of those things the Earthrealm people call... Cartoons?_ With their progressing speed, Scorpion could feel himself moving at an inhuman pace, similar to that of Quan Chi ahead of them. What bewildered him even further was the fact that his legs were in the shape of an inconceivable black blur, as were Quan Chi's. _That's... Impossible!_ Scorpion's thoughts of denial screamed in his head as this wildly confusing environment continued to pull it's physics on them, and for a brief moment time stopped completely.

SCORPION (Assassinium Necropolis)

Then it gradually sped back up, a brief moment of slow motion letting Scorpion regain the normal vision of his legs, and then the world momentarily turned back into that strange way where he was moving at an impossible speed with legs moving in a flurry. Once again, silence permeated the air and for an instant everything stopped.

QUAN CHI (Sorcerus Bastardus)

Again the strange events took place until they both continued to run at that highly inhuman speed. Quan Chi was still sweating madly, the itch of perspiration tickling his skin. A mixture of irritation and terror overtook his expression as he looked back at the ninja spectre, still following suit. Quan Chi uttered a single grunt as he mustered the extra pressure to apply to his legs to make him run faster. Scorpion's eyes widened in surprise, but he quickly imitated this as well and once again drew his weapon, eager for his mortal enemy's blood. As Quan Chi looked back after he was sure to hear the sound of a blade being unsheathed, he saw Scorpion closing in, and uttered a cry of alarm in which a horribly shocking thing happened. First, the sorceror's eyeballs were greatly inflammed, as if they were balloons that someone had put pressure in. Second, his jaw extended to a length that shattered reality, and his tongue sprang out in a way that would put Reptile to shame.

As if this transformation wasn't alarming enough, soon the sorceror's face peeled off and sprang out along with his eyes and tongue, followed by the muscle and bone. A few seconds later when Quan Chi had finished his scream, Scorpion was still phased by it. _Blasphemy! What madness is this? _The shock of it all had slightly slowed Scorpion down, but soon he shook it off, told himself the sorceror had probably used his powers to try deceiving him and returned to chasing him. Quan Chi's face had returned to normal, even he was bewildered by how tragically his expression - no, his entire head - had changed. Nonetheless, the heated chase continued, as vengeful and rigorous as ever. Minutes later Quan Chi found himself at a dead end. He was at the edge of a rather skinny cliff, and Scorpion was prepared for the kill. "Prepare to BURN in HELL, sorceror..." Scorpion quickly flung off his mask and smiled that devilish, bloodthirsty smile, his skull igniting in an intimidating burst of flames. Quan Chi trembled at the mercy of his enemy, and lowly chanted a spell despite how useless it felt.

Scorpion was inhaling deeply, gathering his energy to burn the sorceror as painfully as possible, but then a miracle happened. Quan Chi finished his chant and cast a skull fireball at the ground, and the cliff began to tremble. "Fool!" Scorpion beckoned as he looked at the crack on the ground, suspecting Quan Chi would fall to his death. Instead, however, the entire mountain crumbled to the soil while Quan Chi was safe on his small part of the cliff, somehow mystically floating in the air. A sense of pride and victory overcoming him, the sorceror grinned maliciously as he opened his mouth to release a sadistic cackle, but all that came out was; "MEEP MEEP!"

BEAVIS AND BUTTHEAD

"Uhuhuhuhuhuh, Beavis, check it out..." Two large-headed adolascents were staring at the two oni who had somehow been taken to a world seperate of Quan Chi's current location. "Heh heh, heh heh, you think they got a dollar?" The other boy said moronically as they approached Moloch and Drahmin. "Hey, guys, uh... Can we like, have a dollar? Uhuhuhuhuh..." "Yeah... Heh heh... We need a soda... Heh..." Drahmin stared puzzled at the deformed teens, hesitating on whether or not to kill them, and Moloch unleashed a terrifying howl of annoyance. The brown-haired boy's eyes beamed "Whoa... Huhuh... Cool," he said, and his friend replied with "Heh, heh, we should like... Chain them up for something, and sell them to a pet store... Heh heh..." "Beavis, that's a cool idea... Uhuhuhuhuh..." Drahmin uttered inconceivable noises, and Moloch snarled at them menacingly.

The blonde teen backed off slightly. "Whoa! I think they're gonna kill us! We need to like, put 'em down!... You know, with a gun or something!" The other guy smacked his friend upside the head. "Beavis, you dumbass! If we shoot them, we can't sell them to the pet store! Uhuhuhuhuh..." The blonde retaliated with a similar smack. "Shut up, Butthead!" Moloch and Drahmin let their guard down. "These idiots aren't worth killing. Let's go find someone smarter to eat," Drahmin said. "Alright. I agree." Moloch and Drahmin made their way out of the alley, causing cars to crash and pedestrians to run around screaming.

BARNEY THE DINOSAUR

"Okay, kids! Today we're going to talk about being mad!" A very strange, deformed purple dinosaur with an unusually peppy and happy voice was talking to a group of kids in a colorful room, with the jingling of bells played on mallets playing in the background. "Do you know what you look like when you're mad?" the dinosaur asked them. The children all pouted in a sulk to demonstrate their knowledge of the emotion. "That's right! Now, what happens when you get mad?" A little girl raised her hand. "Yes, Susie?" the dinosaur asked. "You get mean, and you can do bad things that get you in trouble or a time out, and your friends get sad." "That's right!" the dinosaur beamed, adding a little chuckle. "Who else knows what happens when you get mad?" suddenly a portal opened in the room, and Scorpion was flung into it, falling on the ground.

"Why, hello!" the dinosaur perked in it's cheery tone. Scorpion growled in frustration as he got to his feet and brushed himself off, looking around. "Where the hell am I?" "Oh! That's not a nice word! Look, kids, I think this person is mad!" "I'm perfectly sane, leave me alone," Scorpion snarled, turning his back to him. "Looks like this person's pretty grumpy! What do you think we could do to cheer him up?" Another child raised their hand, and the dinosaur gestured to him. "Give him a hug?" "Right! That's a good idea! Now, come here..." The dinosaur slowly trotted over to Scorpion and wrapped his arms around him, embracing him closely in unwanted affection. Scorpion was seriously losing his patience. He would only say it once: "Get off me." However, Barney kept hugging him, and no less than two seconds later Scorpion impaled his chest with his Mugai Ryu and snapped Barney's neck. The room was filled with the screams of children, but Scorpion kept it at that, shook his head in annoyance and burst in a flame, looking elsewhere for Quan Chi.

SESAME STREET

"Wow! What else can Mr. Chi do?" the fuzzy red puppet stared up at the sorceror in amazement. Quan Chi merely sulked, becoming severely impatient with Elmo. "Well, I can summon green skulls of energy, and I can teleport people to other realms..." "Really? How does that work?" Elmo asked in his annoying voice. Quan Chi sighed, and a mischevious grin crept onto his lips. "Like this..." Quan Chi raised his hand and pointed it towards Elmo. And instant later a fiery green skull knocked Elmo off his stool and started to eat him. "NO! NO! IT BURNS! HELP ME, OH HELP ME!" the puppet was literally being torn apart as the skull gradually devoured it's limbs. By the time it had swallowed Elmo's head, it released a loud belch and the puppet's soul briefly flew out, but Quan Chi raised Shinnok's Amulet and absorbed the soul of Elmo. Quan Chi released another evil laugh, got up, and walked away.

FREDDY VS. JASON

"This is becoming _really_ tedious," Scorpion muttered as he started walking around Camp Crystal Lake. It was a dark, eerie night, the moon was out and crickets were chirping. Soon he saw the silhouette of an unnaturally large man wearing a hockey mask, a bloody machete in one hand, the severed head of a burnt man in the other. _Maybe I'll get some answers after all,_ Scorpion thought to himself as he approached the huge figure. "Hey, you!" he called out loudly, and the man looked back at Scorpion. "Where the hell am I, and where's Quan Chi?" The figure tossed the severed head into the water and started walking towards Scorpion, raising his machete. _Oh, I see how it is,_ Scorpion thought as he drew his Mugai Ryu and stormed up to Jason. Jason took a single swing, but Scorpion ducked it and plunged his Mugai Ryu into Jason's chest. "You're slow, you know that?"

Jason shoved Scorpion and his sword off him and took another swing. Scorpion, caught by surprise by Jason's seeming invincibility to his sword, raised the Mugai Ryu just in time to clash with Jason's machete. Scorpion leaned forward and punched Jason across the face, hard enough to make him turn around and stumble sideways a bit. Scorpion then kicked Jason in the back, the blow connecting solid and effected as Jason reeled over, twitching a little. Scorpion then backflipped away to distance himself and shot his spear into Jason, lodging itself in his back and wedged tightly in his flesh. "GET OVER HERE!" Scorpion barked as he yanked with all his might, and Jason was flung towards the ninja spectre. Scorpion readied his blade and swiped at Jason's neck before they could collide, managing to decapitate him. Jason's undead body fell to the ground as Scorpion tossed his head in the water. "I guess I'll get a second answer..." the ninja grumbled as he sheathed his blade and walked off.

Well, there's the first chapter for ya. Sorry if it wasn't that great, it's my first fic in a really long time. Tell me if you liked it and I'll make some more.

SHOWS/MOVIES INCLUDED IN THE NEXT CHAPTER OR LATER ON:

That 70's Show

Happy Tree Friends

Ren and Stimpy

Random Soap Opera (not really familiar with them)

Reno 911

MK CHARACTERS INCLUDED IN NEXT CHAPTER:

Reptile

Baraka

Sub-Zero


End file.
